Never query me personally as to why. But as i sat back at my room flooring, ringing in the ears to the echoes from my today-ex-boyfriend’s wobbly sound advising me he wished to split anything out of, I reduced my mobile and you will, once on time purging it of all the proof of my defunct relationship, started TikTok.
Immediately the For You Page, blissfully unaware of what had just happened, served me with videos of two adorable gays filming an adorable skit for their adorable couples page. Clearly, despite the identified omniscience, TikTok’s algorithm had not been listening in on my calls, nor had it been reading my texts.
When I next braved the app three weeks later, nothing had changed. There they were, taunting me again: sweetheart memes, couples’ skits, soppy compilations of Ian and Mickey away from Shameless. The FYP had been there for me in the darkest depths of the pandemic, but now it had forsaken me; left adrift and single in the depressing sea of #relationship TikTok. Well, I thought, if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions? Up until a few weeks prior I’d been in a (seemingly) happy relationship, so videos that spoke to that experience were exactly the sort of stuff I’d eagerly engaged with. TikTok was only doing its job, but for obvious reasons I desperately wanted out of this nightmarish pit of romantic content.
I started initially to question how long it would do the algorithm to suss aside exactly what got happened on the other side out-of the fresh screen (tl;dr date: went, heart: broken) and you can punt me personally to #SingleTok where I belonged. Thus i build a simple check out: Every single day I would personally continue TikTok and you may search brand new FYP for around half-hour, ignoring dating-inspired stuff and you may twice-tapping almost anything to would which have breakups or being unmarried. In the act I might test out various other approaches to nudge the latest software on the correct recommendations. With some chance, I would personally have the ability to come back my feed so you can a point where We wouldn’t need to hurl my personal cellular telephone over the area. I am able to manage dropping the fresh new sweetheart, but I wasn’t planning to assist TikTok go without a battle.
Go out You to
My first proper reunion with the For You Page was rough. During the 30 minutes I spent scrolling, I came across a nauseating 19 videos about relationships — including at least three couples’ accounts. Only one (a somber Brokeback Hill clip) seemed to capture anything resembling my current mood. As I waded through the thick sludge of content I noted down details of offending videos for later reference — we’re talking five skits with captions containing the phrase «should your sweetheart,» three couples bragging about their intercourse lifestyle, and not one but two Mickey and Ian slideshows. As a result of my thorough note-taking I was perhaps guilty of letting those TikToks play all the way through, and the app possibly misread the watch time as a massive thumbs-up, curating even more scenes of romantic idyll I didn’t want. Needless to say I came away from the experience feeling emotionally drained, but unsurprised. This was not going to happen overnight.
Time Two
For my second dive into the murky waters of the FYP, I needed a change of tack, so I resolved to mark a note on a piece of paper whenever any #relationship videos flashed up, and to swipe past them without hesitation. Once again I spent half an hour scrolling and once again I was made to feel worse for it. I’m unsure how many clips I got through in total, but 42 of them literally had the word ‘boyfriend’ in the goddamn caption. I fell back on the sofa, groaning. Try as I might to steer the algorithm towards memes about being contributed towards and away from skits in the spooning, TikTok wasn’t hearing me.